Blues, Blues Please Go Away

New trimester has already started. Checked my results a few days ago and it was better than I expected consider the fact that I did badly in my exam cos I can't complete a few questions for some papers. If I did that in Form 6 sure I had screwed my paper and get grade like C+. Critical Thinking and Applications in Management is the subject that I scored the best with an A. Worst, gotta be Financial Accounting with B+, which I did not like since I was in secondary school and a subject Managerial Accounting is coming up in the third trimester, sigh.

Don't know why I still feeling blue even the new trimester had started. It is not going away, it is getting worse. Slept a lot these days, lost interest in activities, a sign of stress as my cousin put it. I guess it is so. Even the results that I got can't make me feel happier. Getting good results in my studies doesn't mean that I like what I am studying.

I had been thinking a lot during the holidays. My parents maybe right about something. I can't give up on Science that I studied for 4 years in school. They had been hoping that I can study in Science stream and me too expected to get an offer in the courses that I like and instead, I got an offer in Management, which is not my top interest. I only had myself to blame for filling in the choice in my application form. If only I did not fill Management in one of the column. Why did the government had to be so cruel? Some of my friends don't even get the courses that they wanted and had no choice but to go on with their studies in local universities (a harsh reality to us Form sixers as we put more efforts into our studies compare to Matriculation students and yet they get their choices easier than us).

Money really matters, A LOT. If I had the money, I sure be studying what I wanted now. I'm sure all people feel this way too.

I know, no turning back now, have to continue on with my studies in MMU as I had chose it. No regrets, don't look back, these are the comments that I got or going to get. But I can't help feeling it as I am the person that always go for what I want. I think I must do something about it before my emotion is getting worse and being in this small miserable hostel room is not helping.

From what I observed, people that is not doing the thing that they are not interested might feel the regrets in their life. Someone even told me that the regrets might be forever.... Am I making the right choice? Only time will tell....

I think I am suffering from stress and burnout. Any help for me out there?

*To Joon Sing, thanks for your comment there and make a effort to read my blog. I appreciate it. Hope that you can do well in your studies and do what you feel like doing... The disappointment that I feel is just temporary.

*To Kelly, thanks for your comment. I think I missed you because I can't cope with the changes that is so sudden. But nothing we can do about it, as we are pursuing our dreams. Hope that we can keep in touch. Nice to have a friend like you. ;-)