The Interview

Today is the day before our beloved Malaysia Independence Day and I'm here in the campus while most of the people went back home to celebrate it. Maybe. Or just want to be home with their family consider that Thursday is public holiday and most of the students don't have class on Friday. My room mate went home REAL early, before me going home. I was supposed to go home today by evening but something that is really important that I have to do before I go home so I stay for a few more hours.

What I did? I went for an interview in the SRC Room which the lights are dim and the room is kinda cold. First time went for interview in MMU (I did went through some interviews before but different from this one, of course!!) did quite poor in the session. Stuttered when I answer the first question because I never anticipate the question coming. Sigh... Still have to go through it no matter what. The duration of the interview is 10 minutes which pass real quickly (maybe because I answer their questions with long but mostly indirect answer. The answers that I gave is kinda lame I guess.

It's over now. It is up to the committee to decide if I'm suitable to take up the job. I try my best and have no regrets in it. The encouragement from my cousin and my senior made me try for this as I am sceptical in the first place. Thanks for their encouragement as I gain new experience through this interview even though I did not learn much from it but it is quite memorable.

More things coming up in future. Have to be prepared for all those challenges. I can't be too clingy, depending on people. I must have my own thoughts and life and leave other people alone. It takes time but I'm sure I can do it!!

~LIVE A MEANINGFUL LIFE!!~

One more thing:

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY TO ALL MALAYSIANS!!
- 31ST AUGUST 2006 -
(Phew... It takes hours for me to write this blog)

~KEAT YEE signing off as usual~

Learn Something New Again!

It's been a while since my last update here due to the fact I'm busy with my mid-term exam and all those meetings and assignments (which is killing me slowly). It's been a bad start for me this week on Monday with me coming back here earlier by one hour just for the PTPTN briefing. Went there at 9.30 a.m sharp. Waiting for the successful applicants list and when it is out, check it only to discover that my name was not in the list! I went through the list for the second time to make sure that I did not miss out on my name. But again may name is not there.

Check for the third time, my name is not there too. I am deceiving myself if I look at the list again so I just accept the that I had been unsuccessful in my application. I did cry after that but with some advice from my friend that I have to be tough enough to face it and don't sit there doing nothing. Yeah right. No use cry over spilt milk.

I cried just because I can't tell my parents now that I can't get the loan, considering them had been really in shock with what I did these few months and to tell them I can't get loan is too much for them to take. Starting with me not getting a Science course for my university entry. Then I refused to go to USM to study till I go to USM reluctantly with my father drive to Penang. One week after that, they want back to Penang to get me back to KL. I lost me phone that costs RM 700+ to pickpocket and now the latest news - I can't get the PTPTN loan.

I really don't have the courage to tell them. Because I also need time to come with the terms everything that happens too fast while my parents still can't accept it. So this news is kinda hard for them to digest. No dwelling for me right now. I can't afford to do it. Time is running out. The barring process will start the week after next. It's crazy!!! People see me as a tough person and I thought I am too (even though I am a cry baby sometimes). But even the toughest man has his threshold level too. I can't take it anymore if there is more problem to come.

But luckily with the advice of my senior, I followed his advice. He really the type that calm even though there is problem coming his way. Can think rationally and never get panic. Really salute him and before this I was commenting that he was too cool. He defended that have to be somewhat a little cool to be calm. Me? Get panic and start to think negatively. I get back on track with his advice. If not for sure I will get lost in the middle of nowhere. So now I have to get focused at solving the problem with me knowing the reason why....

The worst thing coming is I have to pay fees by next week. Well, with everything still pending, I really still clueless about some of the things. But now I can see lights at the end of the tunnel with me already consider the worst case scenario. Sigh.... When will be the time I can be as mature as my senior? How can he be so mature yet only one year older? I'm like a kid compare to him. I learnt a lot from him during my 2 and a half months here. I think I rely too much on him for advice, probably due to the fact that he is experienced enough. I have to stand on my own, not just be too dependable on other people.

Lesson learnt: Be independent. Don't be panic when facing problems as it will affect how you think, be calm. "Take a step back and see what you can do" (that's what I hear from him). Find the reason for your problem before doing anything - "the more you know, the more you understand, the better you can analyse, it will give you a better view of the solutions too".

Useful words that I heard from him is really helping me much to go through my problems all these while. Even though he didn't realise it or admit to my compliments but it DID make a difference in my life!!

Now it's time for me to take a step back and let you guys to learn something from this blog (not me, but through the quotations).

Enough said.

~KEAT YEE take a step back and sign off~

My Journal Entry

Phew! Exam is over! A relief for me I guess, after all those sleep deprived days, burning midnight oil, it's over....but wait, still more exams coming in future of course!! Just the thought of it really scared me. Maybe I over worked myself while I was in Form 6. Kinda get sick with all those reading of thick books and notes. I think I have to change my way of studying by now. Too many flaws in my study technique. Anyway, it is over now.

Actually I have many things to tell about the whole but somehow words seems to stuck in my mind. Too tired and mind seem not to work well anymore. Stress is building up as every group assignments seem not going well. I seems to always get those groups that is laid back in their attitude. I am the one who really care about the assignments and worried while they seem not worry at all. This is really stressful for me, I really afraid that I will get heart attack in future living under this circumstances for the next 3 years.

Well, don't want to talk about this anymore. This seems like back stabbing to me. So I just write what I did this whole week; like journal we used to do in secondary school.

Monday, 14th July 2006
I had Information Systems and Multimedia exam in the morning. One hour test, time passed fast and it's over. Still feeling tired from sleeping late the night before just to study for this subject = burning midnight oil. But I think it's worth it though I dozed off a few times studying.

Tuesday, 15th July 2006
Nothing much happen today. Went for the Hari Bersama PTPTN, fill in the form, passed it up, but got rejected because some of the certified copies of certs are done by counselors which they say is in B class of government staff, so I had to go to the library to photostat the certs again. Wow! The line is long when I reach there, wait for half an hour before my turn. Rushed to my faculty to get the copies certified. Went back to the hall to passed it up, Time: 1 pm. Just as when it is the last call for forms. Skipped Management class just for this; first time skipping class and feel guilty about it. As I overheard people said, "for the sake of money, no choice la..."
Managerial Maths exam at night, not really prepared for it, so I did just averagely, I thought I can score for Maths as it is easier than Form 6 Maths T, regret the fact that I did not asked people about a question in my lecture that is similar to that of 1 of the question in the exam. If not, sure score the question. Burning midnight oil again, but kinda fall apart as I dozed off to many times that I gave up studying.

Wednesday, 16th July 2006
Lecture for Maths cancelled, so I got to sleep till 10 something and start studying for Critical Thinking right after brushing my teeth. No breakfast. Just brunch at 12 something, making sandwich myself. Rush for Critical Thinking class at 2 pm, arrive on time by running to the hall as the lecturer did not like people to be late. Sweating like mad!! Got back my assignment today, got an A- for it. Feel satisfied cos my first time doing most of the work and this is last minute work. If my group is more coordinated and they are willing to work harder, sure we can get better grade. Burning midnight oil again, but on the advice of my lecturer I sleep early in order to have better concentration, at 1 something but cleaning up my things made me only got to sleep at about 3 am.

Thursday, 17th July 2006
Woke up at 7 for Accounting tutorial at 8. Went back to room after that, sleep until 11 am before start studying again. Went for Management tutorial at 1 pm and then had discussion for presentation next week, many things is not coordinated yet. Really scared the way students do things here. It really taken it's toll on me. Went for Malaysian studies class, but class cancelled cos the lecturer is busy. Good thing though, cos I got to study more for Critical Thinking.
Went for Critical Thinking exam at 8 pm. Write the whole 2 hours, I guess I can pass the exam if nothing goes wrong. Just crapping the whole paper. But I don't feel worried at all!! When I was in Secondary school, I will be worried with my results; maybe because of the competition, and over here feel like no competition at all. No one to compete with me for better results; looks like the kiasu me is missing. Competition is the thing that encourage me to do better in studies. Looks like I have to look for one smart person that can motivate me. After exam, go online until 3 am. Planned to sleep early but still I can stand the temptation of going online, hehe...

Friday, 18th July 2006
Went back home today as I have no class. Planned to sleep as I had insufficient sleep the whole week.....

Second Childhood?

第二次的童年

六岁那年 渴望张高一点 每一天
一转眼之间 走出了校园 童话在也不见
换另张脸 谁还留住稚气不会变
儿时的音乐 谁还可以陪伴着我哼一遍

在一次回到以前 在一次享受肤浅
想在一次拥有 第二次的童年
在一次围个圆圈 在一次荡个秋千 想找回单纯的脸

回到以前 在一次享受肤浅
想在一次拥有第二次的童年
在一次围个圆圈 把世界缩成一个游乐园
辛福不用智慧也能感觉

Taken from 第二次的童年 ("Second Childhood")
By Daniel Lee 李吉汉

Looking at the lyrics, I can feel the what he is trying to sing about. Childhood is the part of our life that where you have no worries. Children running around with no worries and also their innocent smile and words.

Growing up means you have more responsibilities and worries. Just by looking at our parents is enough. Worry about their children's future, health and their progress in life; not forgetting money problem that is there all the time. I realised that my parents is older now, wrinkles appearing on their face, health deteriorating, I realised how time has passed us by.

Remember all those times in secondary school that shaped who I am today. My best friends, Lien Ghee, Chee Wei, Edwin, Wen Jian, Yeng Yeng, Sharron, Yuen Mei, Nean Hua and Wan Teang. These are the few ones that had give me the motivation in life. They made me realised how vain I was then, lazing around, take everything for granted like what a child would do.

Childhood is the best time of our life. I think all will agree with me. Too bad we can't go back in time. I am still the naive girl I was before. Wonder why I never grow up mentally? Now, I really wonder if love can give us second childhood as claimed in the song? Too naive to even think this way.

Lesson learnt: Yeah, childhood is nice, but people grow up. So I just have to accept the fact that life is this way. No looking back at your footprints but your future (this is what I learnt from someone). GROW UP, GIRL!!

Hope you all will enjoy this blog....

~KISS GOODBYE~

Keat Yee signing off...

Carpe Diem

Hostel Room HB 4 Wing B 5009, 4.45 pm, sunny
Playlist: When You Say Nothing At All & Because You Live with background sound coming from the Bazaar in MMU compound (very loud no?)

It is mid trimester break but I’m back here in MMU. It is hard for me to cut my holiday short consider the fact that it is exam week after the break. But for the sake of the Convofest Bazaar that is held in conjunction with the 7th Convocation of MMU 2006, I came back. I am the working committee of the Promo and Marketing Bureau. Yesterday, there was an event called Malam Persona MMU Opening Ceremony where the Chancellor of MMU, Tun Dr Siti Hasmah Hj Mohd Ali officiating the event. Not the first time I see her, the first time during the Opening Ceremony of Orientation Week. The first time I hear her speaks though, with her soft-spoken voice, about live your life meaningfully while here in MMU and be proud at the moment when you receive your scrolls during convo.

All the performances are cultural dance, and I appreciate performance by those students for the first time!! I was never the one who thank all these, but after going through a major change in my life, I begin to treasure every moment I spent and thank to all the organisers for doing a great job. But one thing I don’t like about the event is that the students imitating the voice of the performers which is quite annoying.

It is really amazing that students are the coordinators for all the events in MMU. Talk about student power. I realized that how small I am here compare to the others in terms of ability. I was intimidated by students here before, seeing that most of them coming from well-being family, wearing branded stuff, trendy, carrying themselves with confidence. But then I understand that other than appearance, the other thing that is the MOST important is your ability.

Have to be more confident with my ability and at the same time build up my skills here that will let me to be seen and heard. It is not all about how much you clothes or handphone worth, but it is the confidence that you have that makes you a respectable person. Who cares if I wear a RM 20 t-shirt? Maybe some will judge you, but these people are the most narrow-minded. But it is important that you carry yourself with your head held high.

I enthusiastically do all the jobs that are directed by my bureau manager. The first time I feel satisfaction in doing thing even though I did it till 3.30 am in the morning and wake up at 6 am.

Lessons learnt: Learn to live a meaningful life and appreciate every moment. Enthusiasm and passion in doing things will bring you forward in life. Life is short.

~Carpe diem~

It's Raining Man

Friday 4th August 2006, 2.40 am, rain

It's raining outside now and now I'm here in my hostel room blogging. Actually I don't have much to write but somehow the rain out there made me wanna blog. And here I am.

It had been a long it rains in the middle of the night here in MMU. At least now I can open my window today while I am sleeping but it will be freezing cold for me to open it. Don't care. Just open it. Why am I so excited about it? The reason is simple: I had been closing windows while sleeping because there are so many mosquitos around that it is impossible to sleep. I have tried this on my first day staying in this room. Before I was staying in anothere where I can open my window wide. But on the 3 times I forgotten to close the window or accidentally opened, I barely can sleep. My room mate too. Really scary.

And now, it is raining outside, I feel like running outside and let the rain falls on me. I feel so carefree this week, relaxing and happy for no specific reason. There's exam and I still feel so happy and relaxing. The exam here is different from school, people are so relaxing taking exam. They can even go out early after exam. Me, stayed till last minute for double-checking, the usual thing I did in exam. Luckily I didn't go out early, if not for sure I lose a lot of marks for Accounting, the subject that is foreign to me, which I only study in KH classes in Form 2 and Form 3. Things is different here as people tend to have a more laid-back attitude. They know for sure that they don't have to score high marks like what I used to during school time.

Back to the topic, it's raining outside, I feel cool, not cold, and hungry. Feel like having a cup noodles but alas, don't have the supply. A simple cup noodle can be satisfying for me. Cheap but nice. Went for a brisk walk outside and feel so refreshing. The air is rejuvenating. Feel like sleeping now but with a hungry stomach, I can't sleep. Have a cup of hot Milo, enjoying music (my collection of favourite Chinese songs - namely 天灰，爱很简单，发如雪， Erica....). Wow!! The feeling is so great. Can't be described with words. People say the best time to sleep is while it is raining. But still I can see hostel rooms with lights on. Not only male hostel, female too. So, I'm not alone in this. Rain had never been this nice before for me. If only someone willing to walk with me in the rain....... This thought is crazy!!!

The time now is 3.30 a.m. Luckily for me I have no class tomorrow. Hehe....

That's all for now. Wanna sleep.

KEAT YEE signing off again....

Simple Life

Here I am blogging again. Even though I have to study for weekly assessment, do Accounting tutorial work and Management assignment awaiting me, I still find blogging more attractive especially when the PC is in front of you.

Today (2nd Aug 2006, Wed) I feel lucky and happy even though there are hiccups here and there.
I did assignment for Critical Thinking till 5 am today which is new record for me (prvious record is 4 am). 2 other members of my group did not help much, I'm the only one that came up with ideas for all (solutions for problem, listing the advantage and disadvantage). They only come up with some ideas for analysing the problem and the guy wrote the letter. 80% of the work is done by me. Squeeze my brain for ideas, typing, printing and also binding. I was really afraid at the morning as the guy didn't answer my phone or reply my messages and finally got to him at 1130 am(we're supposed to pass up the assignment at 2pm). He basically did nothing to my work except for editing the format and wrote a letter that is unsatisfactory. I had to edit his work again and come up with idea for the letter.
Sigh!! It's really crazy. I'm a perfectionist, as those who close to me know it, and I was really unsatisfy with his edited work of mine, so I do what I thought best. The other group member is better, at least she helped me in thinking points for one of the part. Back to the main topic, I finished my work at 1.30 pm. Rushed to printing lab but closed (both of it) and went to library to print which is costly, RM0.30 per page! finished by 1.50 pm, went to shop for binding, and done by 2 pm. Rushed to the lecture hall, sweating like mad, my hands and neck are all wet, lunch not eaten yet. Passed up the assignment, sigh of relief in me.

Lesson learnt: Procrastination kills, maybe not that serious, but it sure hurts. I was always someone who procratinate but somehow this time is really different. Swear not going to procrastinate again. I learn how to choose a better member for assignments.

Even all these happened, I still in good mood. Just that insufficient sleep is killing me. Slept for 2 hours which is a new record.

Night proved to be a better for me. Went to watch a movie called 'Sepet' at e-theatre. Went alone cos no one willing to go. This is the first time watch movie alone and excited about it. The movie was quite compare to local standard. The movie had participated in international movie festivals and even got an award. Maybe it is incomparable to Hollywood blockblusters, but it is quite nice. The storyline is simple. It is about a love story between a Chinese guy and a Malay girl. They overcome barrier to be together. Really touched by it. Hate watch romance movie. Sure cry and this time is no exception.

Lesson learnt: Simplicity is the best. Life is simple and love is simple too. Sometimes people can be clueless about themselves. 很无奈，没选择。

But recently, I have developed a love for things that is simple. Songs like 爱很简单(Love is Simple)， 简简单单(Simple)，有机(Organic Love), Bad Day, Because You Live had been my favourite for the time being. Those songs are like evergreen to me, never got sick of it even though hear many times. And also not forgetting Westlife's songs. No matter what people say about Westlife (boring, sing slow songs), I still like their songs for their simplicity and their meanings.

Well, that's all for now.

KEAT YEE signing off.....